Saturday 4 May 2013
Okay, step one for today’s post, Regular Reader, is to get past the date at the top of the post. Go on, get it out of your system . . . May the 4th be with you . . . yeah, yeah, funny, ha ha. I’ll concede it was effing hilarious the first time I heard it, but after hearing it so many freakin’ times over the years, it is no longer funny to me. Not even a giggle escapes me upon hearing the line. So, now that we’ve got that out of the way, on to the post . . .
Today I fully expected to sit down in front of Dysfunctional Mac and type out a submission email to a publishing house. That was my intention for the day. Instead, however, things went a lil differently. Instead, I wandered around the Internet and had a squiz at a number of sites, and listened to a podcast. Now, some of the sites were Social Media related, like, y’know, Twitter, Facebook, Google+, and then there were a few websites containing different articles that I had had come across links to on the aforementioned Social Media related sites, and lastly came the podcast. Nothing unusual there in the life of someone who likes using Social Media . . . except that I’ve come to a point in this day, or night as it currently is, where I’m thinking: What the Hell was I doing reading some of that stuff? There’s a sh!t load of time I’ll never get back in my life.
Yes, that’s right. I’m implying that the stuff I read today was . . . well, it was crap. Not all of it. No, that would be an unfair generalisation. No, some of the stuff that I read was good. It was entertaining, funny, or informative. But some of the stuff was just downright rubbish and a waste of my time. And like I previously wrote, it’s not time that I’ll ever get back.
At this point, I’m sure that some of you will want to know exactly what it was that I read that was crap so that you can avoid it. Oh, that’s what you’re telling yourselves, but you really want to know the crap sites and posts so you too can mosey on over and see whether or not I’m right on the money about their crappiness. However, it’s at this point that I’ll politely point out that I’d rather tell you sites and posts that are worth your time than those that are not. Y’know, spread the good for my own Karmic comeback. And hey, I’m sure there are people out there who think my site is a bunch of crap and that’s their prerogative. I’d like to find out who they are so that I can beat them into submission, but we’re all allowed our opinions. Right? Incidentally, the word really is ‘prerogative’ not ‘perogative’. I know, it kinda grates me the wrong way too.
Anyway, back to the crap stuff I read today. It wasn’t limited to just the reading of crap, but did in fact cover the podcast too. So, I listened to crap as well as reading it. Yep, my day was somewhat filled with poo, excrement, faeces, sh!t, waste, dung . . . you’re getting the picture, aren’t you? Good.
The worst part of all of this crap was that people who are, allegedly, experts and authorities in their fields spouted it. My thinking, however, after today is that these people are more egotists than experts, and arsewipes more than authorities. They spend more time telling the reader and listener how effin’ fabulous they are than explaining what they do and how they do it, and if they eventually do get around to the how, the secret to their success/brand/business that they’ve been holding on to for so long, it’s really just a bunch of buzzwords, and wee bit of common sense, and a truck load of bulldust.
But there’s the rub, isn’t it? They’re ‘experts’ and ‘authorities’ because they talk themselves up and spruik their own fabulousness to the world, and a bunch of people believe them and whatever sh!t they’re spinning. And I got suckered in to reading and listening to some of that crap today. In my defence, it was a bit like the whole ghoulish watching a train wreck scenario where you don’t wanna watch it happen, but you can’t help yourself. You have to see the outcome of the crash, you have to see how bad it is.
Let me get this straight, though: I don’t have a problem with people writing or podcasting about what they know. So many people do it, and they do it so bloody well. They do. Their sites are interesting, their posts compelling reading, their knowledge of their area of expertise is inspiring, and their enthusiasm is infectious . . . and not infectious in a bad way that makes you hot and sweaty and itchy . . . infectious in that as a reader or listener you just want to absorb everything that person knows about whatever topic they know about. They make you wanna go out in to the world and kick its arse kinda inspiring. Those experts and authorities are the ones who make you sigh and wish you could be as brilliant as they are after reading one of their posts. They’re the real experts, and those are the sites and podcasts that I can’t get enough of. They’re the ones whose sites I go back to on a daily basis.
The ones that I encountered today are not those experts. No, they are the ones who have massive egos, spin lots of crap, use lots of ‘I’ and ‘me’ statements, and who simply seem to me to be regurgitating work that someone else in their ‘area of expertise’ has already covered in a far superior way.
Aaaaahhhhh, I feel much better about how I spent my day now. And you? Well, you’re probably thinking ‘What the Hell was I doing reading this post? There’s a sh!t load of time I’ll never get back in my life.’
Like I wrote earlier: I’m sure there are people out there who think my site is a bunch of crap and that’s their prerogative. Probably explains some of my blog stats . . .